Sunday, January 23, 2011

"The Other"

I watched the above video, posted at this blog today.  I started to write a comment, but it kinda turned into a blog post instead of a comment.  

I couldn't help but think of "The Other" in my case being an adoptive mother or a prospective adoptive mother.  I kept finding myself thinking that The Other would never come to see adoption from my point of view, as adoption to The Other is not about loss of a child.  To The Other, I am someone who wants to take away her ability to become a mother.

I am not anti-adoption, I am pro-family preservation.  "The Other" looks at me as someone who wants to keep children in families with parents who are unworthy of being parents.  Too young, not married, too poor, etc.  Often times The Other looks at adoption in these cases as "saving" the child from a life not-good-enough.

Family preservation and Pro-adoption.  Both sides are convinced that their view is the correct view.  Both sides see that they are looking at adoption as what is best for the child.  Will these two sides ever come together?  

Will the adoptee voice ever be taken into consideration?


  1. Thank you for posting this. My life is full of “Others” whom I have had to learn to love despite having fundamentally opposed thoughts and beliefs.

    I can’t wait to hear how your lunch goes!

  2. Perhaps we should challenge ourselves to each do this - have a virtual lunch online?